The controversy that has animated the tv show ” Key not at my post “, Thursday, October 25, on a relationship non-consensual, between an adult and his girlfriend sleeping at the time of the facts, shows how the subject of marital rape remains taboo and minimized.

A perception of rape is summarized by the intervention of the ex-Miss France Delphine Wespiser, who was described as ” quite cute, quite nice (…), things that are done when one or the other person is sleeping “, when talking about ” her boyfriend, with who she is and that she is supposed to love.” A perception, which presupposes a continuing consent of both partners, since they are by nature romantic partners, but that is dramatically removed from the reality of rape.

Because in addition to the fact that the law defines rape as ” any act of sexual penetration, of whatever nature, committed on the person of another by violence, constraint, threat or surprise “, and that the consent of a person in a sexual relationship does not exist automatically in a couple, the official figures are there to remind you : the vast majority of rapes are committed by relatives of the victim.

Read also : Harassment, assault, rape : how the law defines sexual violence

In a report made on 22 February by Marie-Pierre Rixain (the president of the delegation for the rights of women in the national Assembly) and member of parliament Sophie Auconie, the head of the department of women’s rights and equality between women and men, Hélène Furnon-Petrescu, recalled that, among the 108 000 victims of rape or attempted rape reported in 2017 (of which 93 000 women and 15 000 men), 91 % knew the aggressor, and 45 % of abusers were the spouse or ex-spouse.

rape and attempted rape : 91 % of abusers are relatives of the victim Part of the authors or autrices of rape or attempted rape-known(s)of the victim. Source : information Report by Sophie Auconie, Marie-Pierre Rixain, February 2018

Despite this, only 9 % of the victims have filed a complaint in 2017. “There are a lot of business classified and non-places because of lack of evidence put forward in 2016, the psychiatrist Muriel Salmona, president of the association traumatic Memory and victimology, which accompanies the victims of violence. Some preliminary investigations can be botched, and the word of the victims is sometimes décrédibilisée because they commit inaccuracies. “

Read also : “To the marital rape, in 90 % of cases the complaint is classified without continuation”